Now I know how Brangelina feels!!
Welcome to the Hamptons... I've always loved the summers here for two reasons; 1-I can actually enjoy my backyard and pool 2-I get to see people from the city and out of town who I don't know!!! I grew up in a suburb where my next door neighbor was my best friend Michael Lieberman and the neighbors on the other side... I had NO CLUE WHO THEY WERE. Steven Garber lived across the street and around the corner the Gambinos who we didn't know at all (although we didn't talk to them for an entirely different set of reasons and it involves hanging with sea creatures!). After that I moved to Washington D.C. for college and after that Manhattan. I'm a little like Garbo, I want to be left alone.

Anyway, I have a friend who recently broke up with their other half and of course... strangers from far and wide have been giving her comfort. The UPS guy, the town secretary and even the entire 3rd grade class from Sag Harbor Elementary have weighed in. Now how did this happen? This is summer! Doesn't anyone have something better to talk about ... like... Christie Brinkley and Peter Cooke... or Madonna's marital woes and hanging in Amagansett with Apple and Gwynnie?!?

It's weird this year. I recently went to the opening day of Polo and my friend who had my ticket/bracelet went MIA. I was hanging by the gate with a glass of champagne that a more respectable friend quickly threw in my hand so I didn't look so pathetic. I can just hear the onlookers, "How pathetic trying to crash but at least he has a glass of something!" Even though I pulled my baseball cap far over my face... I WAS SPOTTED. A friend soon text messaged me saying, "I heard you can't get into polo.... dinner later?" Oh the shame! I haven't been this embarrassed since I was spotted buying sweaters at TJ Maxx! Although I feel better since I spotted Kelsey Grammer and his wife there (I guess those Frasier re-runs don't pay as well as you think).

Anyway, in conclusion... If you want a private life... don't live in the Hamptons and don't become a celebrity. And especially don't become a celebrity and move to the Hamptons... otherwise you'll have some jerk writing on their blog about your marriage or where you shop!

And another thing... 50 year old woman should not wear pig tails. IT'S JUST WRONG FOR SO MANY REASONS!